Tuesday, February 12, 2013

What To Do When You're Trapped in an Hourglass

Hourglasses make me nervous.

Don't ask me why; they just do. I think I'm scarred from playing too many boardgames as a child. Hey, don't laugh! You know that purple sand made your heart pound!

In light of recent, LIFE-ALTERING events, I've been thinking a lot about Time...mostly because it doesn't exist anymore. It's like an extinct species, sitting on a list somewhere next to the Dodo bird. It did, however, have the courtesy to leave me a suicide note before ending its wretched life:

Dear Psycho,

As if I wasn't emaciated enough by your job and your book #3 and working out and cooking and cleaning, then you had to go and have a baby. I decided to end my misery and be done with it. Don't bother looking for me; I'm finishing myself off with your laundry.


Theatrics aside, OH. MY. GOODNESS. I feel like I need to clone myself, and then clone all my clones. I'm sure I'll hit some sort of stride, now that I've returned to work, but right now....AOSSEIFJSKFASKFKASJEFKAJSEFKJ!!!!

Which brings me back to Princess Jasmine...

It's like every grain of sand dumping on top of my head is something I need to get done (let's be honest here...most of those things I put on myself...). We all have these moments; we all have times in life where we feel like we're juggling all seven Harry Potter books and then someone tells you to do it with your eyes closed. (Right now, I feel like I'm juggling our entire bookshelf...)

But if Princess Jasmine can survive it, so can you.

Rule #1) Don't Panic.
   Okay, so this is probably the hardest for me, but I'm *learning* that those dishes really can wait. And so can dusting things, like the baseboards. We've also invested in a Roomba ;D

Rule #2) Take a Step Back & BREATHE. (and try not to inhale sand.)
    In other words, TAKE A LONG, HOT SHOWER. No, really. Stay there awhile.

Rule #3) When All Else Fails, Wait for Aladdin to Rescue You.
    ...that would be Ben. He talks me through the chaos and helps me organize it into appropriate categories... he's also been surprising me with flowers. :D

So, I sincerely apologize for any lapse in communication or embarrassingly long delay between emails...I HAVE NOT FORGOTTEN. I have been using EVERY spare second I have to finish this draft of book 3!


  1. Yeah, I remember those days. You are totally excused. The first year is a freebie. After that, though, you're expected to be able to sit and type with the baby in your lap trying to bang on the keyboard.

    1. Ha! Well, I sure can use that freebie...although I do so UNwillingly.

      Does that mean that each subsequent year I get to blame all typos on my baby??

    2. No, you only get a few months of that. Afterward, you're expected to have adapted.

  2. A long, hot shower. Ohhhh my gosh does that sound nice.

    You're doing great, girl. Don't beat yourself up!

    1. Aren't they the BEST?!

      And THANK YOU! I'm not TRYING to beat myself up; I really want to do all of those things. And, as you know, they just can't happen simultaneously!

  3. I really feel for you! Time's suicide note is hilarious - 'don't look for me' - he he! I hope you get things in balance soon. You're quite right about dusting not needing doing very often :-)

    1. Thanks, Linda! I hope so, too. Why can't feather dusters dust themselves?? Now I'm thinking of Beauty and the Beast... :P

  4. Hi, Barbara. My boys are teens now, but I, too, have been struggling. I told myself I was going to back off promotion and social networking this year and simply concentrate on writing. It's tough with a day job that keeps me for 11 hours. Sadly, the hours have now grown more difficult and fast-paced. Then I hit the treadmill for an hour. Now I'm barely writing these days as well. Yesterday I took a mental health day. We ordered pizza and watched the new James Bond BluRay.
    You can only do the best you can. Hang in there. *waves*


    1. Thanks, Jimmy! Helps to hear others dealing with the Problem of Time :D You're right: You really can only do what you can do. I'm trying to be satisfied with *maybe* 1000 words/ day. It's hard when you're used to being able to have HUGE chunks of time, and then all of a sudden, you're lucky to get an hour at a time.

      Sounds like you need to hang in there, too!

  5. At the end of this when I read "Wait for Aladdin to rescue you" all I could think was, "I have the REAL Aladdin!" hahaha. I struggle with this time thing in a different way--I feel like I'm always running out of time. I'm not sure how I actually measure it--days, lifetimes? You can't really do that. So I'm trying to get better at just accomplishing what I can and being satisfied.


  6. Hey Barb! I was wondering how you've been! Girl, you just gotta go with the flow and accept you can't (and won't) do everything. Life as a mother is a different world--even moreso when you have a brand new baby. You make priorities and you do what you can with the understanding that family comes first, as well as good mental health for yourself. Nate and I always laugh when friends of ours who aren't parents say they're too busy or don't have time. They have NO idea!

    I'm sure you're having the time of your life while wondering what happened to time. lol :D

  7. You are seriously SUPER WOMAN! Full time work. New Baby. Gotta write Book 3...

    Breathe, woman. BREATHE!!

    Haha! Seriously, you're awesome! And sounds like your hubby is awesome too ( : Can't believe how big your lil' man has gotten... he is adorable. Whenever you're ready for a Book 3 beta, I'm so there!

    P.s. And I think we're all just happy that despite the crazy, you haven't lost your love of Harry Potter. Cause really? That's what its all about ( : Heehee.

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